Parent Reflections

Diagnosis


Parent Reflections

You’ve got troubles, well I’ve got them too.  You are not alone, because you’ve got a friend in me . . .

How I Felt at First . . .

Alone, heartbroken, and depressed. Relieved to have a diagnosis, because I thought something was wrong. Needing help and comfort. Looking for someone to blame. Shocked, confused, and fearful of what the future would hold for my child and family.

What Helped . . .

Someone told me that I was not alone, and life could still be “normal”. Knowing that nothing had really changed. This is still my child that I love, but now I have a label. Someone reminded me that I was the only mother my son had and I needed to focus on his needs. Support from other parents. Learning to take care of myself, so I could take care of her. Getting information. Connecting to Babies Can’t Wait. Accepting help from family and friends. Learning to celebrate my child and family.

What I Have Learned . . .

How brave he is. Perseverance. Unconditional love. Even a child with an intellectual disability can be smart! Never underestimate our kids. They surprise us every day! Celebrate the small victories that others may take for granted. Think out of the box. Celebrate who she is and not who she isn’t. I couldn’t envision then what a gift he is – I can’t imagine my life without him.

Words of Advice . . .

You are not alone! Focus on the child and not the disability. Love your child. Everything does not have to be about therapy. Take care of yourself. Take one day at a time. Protect your marriage. Listen to your gut. Don’t believe in labels Don’t be afraid to ask for help! Aim high! This is not the end, but the beginning.

My Son, My Sun, My World
Sitara holding her son Ishan as a young child

Ishan, my son, my sun (Ishan in Urdu Language means Sun), my world. Ishan was born in October of 2001. I had a normal pregnancy, but the minute he was born my perfect little world was shattered. Read more of this story . . .

Augie’s Autism

Augie was almost three when he pulled a lamp off a desk onto himself. The light bulb burned a perfect circle into his knee. I picked up my screaming child and could smell the burnt flesh. I enjoyed holding him in the rocker, even though he was crying loudly. If he was awake, Augie was usually too busy to sit in my lap. My friends referred to him as “all boy,” but I wondered if there was more to it. Read more of this story.

Laurie’s Daughter

I went to the elementary school for a teacher meeting and she told me that my child had learning disabilities. I was blindsided and incredibly upset! I cried when the school staff explained the test results to me . . . Read more of this story.

Gavin

Gavin showing off his Special Olympic medal

We were excited to find out we were going to have a baby and couldn’t wait to find out the sex. The day finally came to find out whether we were having a boy or a girl. The Sonographer was doing my ultrasound and she got quiet and keep looking at a certain area. She said I will be right back. When she came back she had my doctor with her. Read more of this story